“My idea is based on the reality that is about to come. My Dollar redesign proposal is a window into our future. A future led by three of today’s most noted ‘tea’ drinkers: Glen Beck, Sarah Palin and Rush Limbaugh.
Each bill uses a striking image of each of these future founding fathers (of a new for old America), which also includes one founding mother I might add – a ‘lady’ who is soon to be our first fearless female leader – you betcha! Each note also is exactly the same size because, lets face it, Americans will never change, so lets keep the sizes the same – OK? – besides it helps when you’re trying to make really neat piles or load up all your reserve cash in a suitcase for a ‘long trip’ or fast getaway for instance. And honestly I NEVER hold my cash vertically – and don’t forget about the vending machines!
The choice of colors and the typography – Comic Sans – is completely random, although Comic Sans is one of my favorite typefaces including Arial and Helvetica. I also just thought they looked good. Each note also includes one line from our new constitution, a simplified mantra that will be easy to follow and understand by everyone. I’ve also included an image of our new flag, the tea flag, which represents the endless fight our country has endured over the last few years in pursuit of greed, selfishness and fried chicken. I also tried to estimate the value of each note in future terms, but it was hard as I failed math and don’t know how to use a calculator. But I think in most cases our currency will be worthless anyway so I figured it didn’t really matter.”
Vincent Kettering is a bottle cap collector, municipal trash collection supervisor and father of 16 (of his own) children. He lives in Paris, TX.
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